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Romney: Masterdbater |
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Posted on Feb 03 2016 at 10:45 AM | |
Latest Articles | Morty Rabinovitzski |
Debate, like karate, the KKK and synchronized swimming, ranks players by skill levels to give all comers a fighting chance.
In karate, a yellow belt doesn't fight a black belt. In the KKK, Grand Wizard and Tea Party supporter David Duke is clearly held in higher regard than the everyday neo-nazi skinhead. Synchronized swimming features the standard gay division, the Tony Romo homo rank and the fagala flamer.
Debaters, too, come in different skill levels Some kids start early – like Jerry Sandusky's shower partners – in middle school in the junior division. High school kids debate in the University Interscholastic League. By the time a debater reaches the big leagues, with national TV exposure and control of the free world at stake, he or she had better have graduated to the "master" level.
In Wednesday night's debate, Mitt "ain't he sweet" Romney showed the entire country that he indeed is a master debater. He throttled the debate right out of the box, jerking it back and forth, up and down, stroking it unmercifully until he almost hit a climax.
But at the brink the Rominator backed off, slowing his rhythm so as not to go off on O'Commie too early. Instead, he steadily pounded his immigrant opponent with zinger after zinger until that Muslim half breed felt like he was back home in Namibia. "How many licks does it take to get the the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" asked moderator Jim Lehrer. "A one . . . a two . . . a three! - in yo' face B. Hussain O'Splooge!" Romney exclaimed.
As only a master debater can do, Mitty triumphantly pumped his beaten opponent's hand afterwards, toweled off, and headed straight for the Purell. The Mittzter may as well have thrown $50,000 on the stage and ended by saying, "I'm out," Kramer style. What a performance!
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