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C. Wad converts to Islam!

C Wad Drunk
Posted on May 01 2019 at 3:37 PM
Latest Articles | C Wad Drunk

With the guidance of Allah, Most High and Merciful, He Who Sees All and Knows All, and His only Prophet Muhammad (Peace Be Upon Him) Today I hereby announce my conversion to Islam! Please no longer call me by my slave name C Wadsworth Longfellow for I am reborn as JIZYA AL-JIHADI (you can all me AL).

To all my former infidel friends I implore you to listen to why I needed Allah’s call.

1. Like the Perfect Man, I can now freely marry six year olds and deflower nine year olds, putting me on a level playing field with our Great Satan enemies in the U.S. Government
2. I can freely call Jews dogs and pigs
3. I can chant DEATH TO AMERICA! at all hours
4. I can cut off the clits of feminists
5. I can throw fags off roofs
6. I can kill apostates by smiting their necks
7. I can join OPEC to receive better prices for my oil investments

Fear not Infidels! In the traditional of great Persian poets such as Rumi, I will still offer my lyrics gifts, now only in the service of the Ummah. Below see my first feeble effort


Ride my ripe zucchini
Till it shoots tahini
Praise Allah Most Glorious
As I cut off your clitoris
Now put back on your burkini

Surah note: while the Limerick is an infidel form, seeing as we will control the United Kingdom soon, it will become part of Dar es Islam.

May Allah bless all of you as our hijira continues. Death to Israel! Death to America!

JIZYA al-Jihadi does not encourage violence or offer material support to terrorists.